Springing into spring

Exhausted

That's how I feel right now.

But there's a few minutes before I'll make myself go to sleep, so I thought I'd write. :)

I'm listening to the fabulous Wes Pickering while I write this.

Today was long. It was good, but reallllllly long, and I am so tired. I woke up at 6 and left to Abby's house, hung out there until like... 8:40, then I went into work. My boss was in St. L. all day yesterday picking up a new shipment of computers, and apparently was in and out all night going back and forth, so when we got there he was still sleeping. Ha. Nice.

Actually, he felt *really* bad about it. Abby and I just spent some very lovely time outside. I didn't mind at all. It was nice to be able to be out enjoying the day instead of being stuck inside all day. Anyway, later on we went in and sort of had a meeting about all that we want to get done, how to accomplish things better, etc. I don't really feel like we got much done, but that's what he wanted to do, so oh well. Monday will be packed full (no pun intended.) of packing since we already have lots of orders to ship out. I'm already tired thinking about it. But it's sooo great for us and we've been quite a bit over our daily sales for each day, which is wonderful.

I'm rambling about work... I'm sorry. But the point of talking about work was to tell you that Friday went SO well. After a wretchedly stressful Thursday, my stress levels could hardly take more. But Jesus is always with me, and He watched over and took care of everything. The customer on the other side of getting the wrong product that was my fault was great and super kind. He was ready and willing to ship the part back after I sent him the shipping label. Hopefully it'll get here on Monday and I can ship him the correct part. My co-worker, Isaac was super awesome and helped me deal with it. I've been so blessed with such a great boss and co-workers thus far. That's *huge*, and so wonderful. Friday was great, I took an hour lunch with Abby and we got mountain dew and skittles and sat in the sun and thought of Amy. <3 I love Abby. She's such an incredible friend to me.

We went to a Seussical rehearsal today! People, it's going to be SO OSM. The vocals are INcredible. I cannot WAIT. :) I looked ridiculous onstage holding a pretend animal cage for the circus, but oh well, I suppose. :) Abby was there with me the whole time. ;) Next week is the tech rehearsal, and I'm so thankful. We open in like... a month. Or less. Less than a month. DUDE! It's going to be here SO soon! Our orchestra sounds so gorgeous! It's soooo loud underneath them and crazy hard to hear the cues.

I hope you'll come and see it, because I know you'll love it.

Maybe one of these days I'll get to bake something worth taking pictures of and posting... All my posts have been as of late are pictures. I hope you don't mind them.

Much love to you and yours,
Lizziebeth.

Wait, wait, wait. Is it ONLY 9:09? Really? Because I SERIOUSLY thought that it was after 10... Oh man...

Oh! Hahahahaha! I totally forgot the entire reason for this posting. :)

On Friday, Abby and I made our first sale! :D I was pretty thrilled. We sold a pretty nice laptop for a nice price. Hopefully our boss was happy, because it felt so great to get a sale for the first time. Our boss's goal is for us to basically take over sales and customer support, along with management positions, so I was really happy that we finally made a sale.

100th blog post! Hooray!

Today. The day. 3/10/11

So today happened.

And in some ways, it went smoothly. And in others, it went horribly wrong and I was so stressed I was near the breaking point of sobbing at the drop of a hat.

I didn't get my sheets back on my bed. So I'm sleeping in a pile of snuggly blankets. I don't mind a bit.

I didn't get a dessert made, but I did make some yummy Jell-O things, and the boys were happy about that. :)

I didn't get Anatomy finished, that means parts of Saturday, and Sunday are going to be filled with it. *sigh*

I didn't help as much as I should have.

I'm staying up late to write this.

I was *STRESSED*.

I remembered Amy and wished that I was with her.




Eh.

Jesus is beautiful and He loves me. This is what matters.

Today happened. Which means that it was 3 1/2 years since Amy has been here. But I'm so glad she's not on this wretched earth. Life is hard and people disappoint.

DUDE! That was encouraging.

But it is true. Going through some reaaaaaaally hard things right now shows me that.

But also, Christ is FULL of mercy, and if something doesn't give Him the glory, He's not going to put me through it. So His name will be glorified in this hurricane.

Also, today happened, and I realized that I screwed up at work. I was checking ebay and we had a message from a buyer that had gotten the wrong item. Nothing like the one that happened to my co-worker, but OH MAN. Was I sick the moment I saw that. That was my biggest shipping fear.

And. It. Happened. Today.

*Sob*.

So I freaked, I prayed, (wrong order.), I told my Mama, I wrote my boss, I wrote my dearest co-worker ever, Abby and then I came up to my room and almost lost it. But then refrained, because if I started sobbing, it would end with me sleeping 12 hours and not spending the rest of the night with my dear family who has so graciously adjusted to my retarded schedule.

My boss replied, said that it was alright, that we're all learning. I still felt bad. Abby replied, said she was praying for me, and that she loved me, and that it was alright.

I laughed, I ate food, I spent the night watching a movie with my family and trying to get some Anatomy done.

So I'm officially through today and the major trials, I'm about to go to bed, and 'Be Thou Vision' is playing on Pandora.

My Jesus loves me, and I love Him.
This matters.
Life matters.
You matter.

Love to you,
Bethan.

3 1/2 Years

So the 10th marks 3 1/2 years since Amy died.

Yesterday marked the 3 1/2 years since I went up to Barns to have all of the tests taken for being the 2nd donor for another BMT.

She was so sick that day. The meds that she was on had her really confused and it was reminding us of how it was when Grandma Martin was sick. Thankfully, Jesus pulled her out of all of that confusion, and when she passed away that following Monday, she was clearly alert of it all.

It's beautiful to see what peace God has given me 3 1/2 years later. When some days my heart aches so badly for her that I feel like there's no possible way to go on and all I want is heaven, I remember all that Jesus has brought me through. How He saved me by His grace, and how He used her in other's lives so amazingly.

The other night I dreamed that Gary and Brandon surprised us and came to visit. I don't normally have very vivid dreams where I feel emotion, but I remember being so incredibly happy in that dream.

My sister was beautiful. She's my hero. But she was also human. She had feelings, she was a sinner, she could be mean when she wanted, she loved her family. She loved me. She loved Jesus most of all.

So what am I feeling, as the three and a half year marker arrives?

Peace. There is so much peace concerning her. She's with Christ. She's thrilled, she's singing praises to our Saviour each moment, she rejoices when a lost sinner is saved, and she feels no more pain.

My Mama said to me, that being on cemo is like having the flu. So basically, my sister felt like she had the flu for a year and a half. When I had the flu for a week, I felt like it would never end. I couldn't imagine it for a year and a half.

Hug your family, be kind, and thankful. Christ knows all things, even when we think that He doesn't. Even when our lives are so screwed up that we wonder how God could be getting *any* glory out of it, just trust Him. Because He doesn't put us into situations and then not have it glorify Him in the end.

Here's a song from today's service at church. Today's message was beautiful and I got so much out of it, by the grace of God.

Love to you and yours,
Bethan

Thanks to God for my Redeemer,
Thanks for all Thou dost provide!
Thanks for times now but a memory,
Thanks for Jesus by my side!
Thanks for pleasant, balmy springtime,
Thanks for dark and stormy fall!
Thanks for tears by now forgotten,
Thanks for peace within my soul!

Thanks for prayers that Thou hast answered,
Thanks for what Thou dost deny!
Thanks for storms that I have weathered,
Thanks for all Thou dost supply!
Thanks for pain, and thanks for pleasure,
Thanks for comfort in despair!
Thanks for grace that none can measure,
Thanks for love beyond compare!

Thanks for roses by the wayside,
Thanks for thorns their stems contain!
Thanks for home and thanks for fireside,
Thanks for hope, that sweet refrain!
Thanks for joy and thanks for sorrow,
Thanks for heavenly peace with Thee!
Thanks for hope in the tomorrow,
Thanks through all eternity!
John A. Hultman

Compassion on the ignorant

"When human beings surround an uncompassionate person, they soon find it out and fly off at a tangent as if by instinct. You may collect people for a time by some extraneous means, but unless your heart goes out with desires for their good, they will soon weary of you. The multitude still clung to the skirts of Jesus even to the last, whenever he preached, because they saw that He really desired their good. You must have compassion if you are to keep up the attention of those whom you address." C.S. Spurgeon.

"Who can have compassion on the ignorant, and on them that are our of the way; for that he himself also is compassed with infirmity." -Hebrews 5:2

A crazy week

Ack. I miss blogging. Which is ridiculous, because I know that I don't blog on here very much... Oh well. I still miss it.

Right now I'm sitting up in my room getting ready to do my Bible reading and listening to hymns. I haven't had time to listen to any hymns the past few days, and I miss it so much.

Work has been great this week, but after getting 29 1/2 hours in 3 days, and then working Friday and a half day today, I'm sooo ready for a break. I've been feeling guilty for not being at work, and it's starting to bother me. Micom is *not* mine. It's not my life, it's not my business. I'm to be the best employee that I can be without messing up my family life, but that doesn't include working 13 hour days every single day. I need to remember that these long weeks are only for right now, and I cannot do it every week. I've got the rest of highschool to focus on, and then studying for the ACT. Those are needed necessities, not just "eh".

The past couple days at work have been stressful. A pretty major mistake was made my one of my co-workers, and yesterday there was a rather big blow up about it. I mean, that being a relative term, because there wasn't screaming, but there was some serious conversations and some words that shouldn't of been said. I felt awful about it, even thought it honestly was *not* my fault. I don't like to see others screw up and mess our orders up, but if they're not being careful and double checking things, they very rightly deserve to reprimanded for it.

I don't know... It's just hard, I guess. I'm praying that I don't make mistakes and that I'm respectful to my boss, even if I am having a bad day or something.

I am so thankful for his kindness. He's patient and helps me figure out things when I totally don't have a clue how to do them, and our whole work crew just has *fun* together. We laugh hard and are encouraging.

My heart is heavy for my boss' salvation. He's a kind and generous *person*, but he's lost and wretched in his heart. I pray that Christ will use me to be a good godly example, as well as A, and Mr. Y.

God is so full of mercy. He is King over all and He loves me so much. I am so thankful for it.

Have a beautiful Lord's day tomorrow. I hope that each one of you gets something True and meaningful out of the day.

Bethan

Wednesday-my-only-day-off-this-week

Hello! :D I'm siting on the floor of our living room [not at work] and pretending to be doing my Consumer Math tests. Since I've been working all week, and will work the rest of the week, I'm taking today to fit in the entire week's worth of school. Excluding Math. Are you kidding me? 3 lessons of Adv. Math in one day? Yeah. Right. Only... I could do it. But I won't. For the sake of my family and a high risk of having a meltdown. Yucky.

So today I have the hymns a playin' while I work on school. At work the station is kept at 98.9, and frankly, I tire of listening to Katy Perry after awhile... Sadly, my boss is not a Christian, and so he doesn't think to switch it to the Christian music station. But in the last two days, there haven't been very many nasty songs on, so I'm very thankful.

Work is going great. I am loving my job so far. It's such an incredibly huge blessing. Right now I'm mainly organizing, packing computers that need to be shipped out, getting stuff that we need for organizing, helping unload and unpack things, etc. I've been completely exhausted after getting home, but it's a good exhausted after I hard day of work. We just moved locations to the old University Bookstore, so we're waiting for the carpet to get in, shelves to be put in, etc. I'm thinking we'll be open by Monday, but I don't know. The plan was by Thursday, but then the carpet people came FOUR days late. :S

My boss is really kind. I'm so thankful. I can't imagine working somewhere and not liking my boss. That would be so horrid. He reminds me of Daniel, in a way. He gets excited about new computers coming in, and like anything computer related. And he has a hilarious sense of humor. He praises us when we do a good job, and if a co-worker messes up something major, he keeps calm around us and takes care of it without getting really angry or yelling. I'm thankful for that respect. Or personality. Whatever it is, I'm thankful for it. Even still though, I'm not looking forward to a bad day where I'll mess something up. I'm praying that day won't come.

It's already lunch time. I told Mama last night that we needed to have something other than sandwiches for lunch today. ;) So there's baked spaghetti in the oven. This day will fly by, I know it. So I'm enjoying it while I can, and not stressing about school. But knowing the amount of Anatomy that I have to do today, that'll probably change.

Once we get the store opened, we'll work much less. Hopefully like... 12 hours on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Then some at home when we get that set up. I'm excited. :D

I hope *you* are having a lovely Wednesday! Enjoy it!
Bethan